


The First Session

by annewritesstuff



Series: Sessions with Peylore [1]
Category: Shield of Tomorrow (Web Series)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 04:26:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14845680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annewritesstuff/pseuds/annewritesstuff
Summary: After the mission on Kanjis-2, Ensign Hart finds herself face to face with a new counselor, someone who has taken on the challenge of getting her to talk.





	The First Session

Kara Hart had been perfectly content flying under the radar upon receiving her commission, working the Helm during the Gamma shift, keeping herself out of sight and out of trouble. She had left Starfleet Academy feeling hopeful yet anxious and it had taken her a few weeks to find her stride, especially after their first encounter with the Orions and the loss of Chief Engineer Xadas. She slowly made friends and formed bonds over time but still mostly kept herself out of the way, training and practicing.

Her first year of service had gone by without much issue. She had gained the benefit of Commander Rue’s mentoring and along the way, she grew more and more confident with her abilities and her contributions to the ship.

Despite the mentoring and training, it had been a strange request at first, but when Commander Rue had tasked her to guard Zazrit, Kara had gone along with it.

_“You’re more than capable, Ensign. This is an easy assignment. I’ve read your file; I know what you can do. We’ve spent more than enough time training together. You’ve got this.”_

Remembering the Commander’s words, she knew that they were aware of some of the issues around her mental health but still, they had faith.

Despite her struggles and the occasional dodging of her counselling sessions, she was deemed fit to do more and be transferred to the Alpha shift. She often took over at the Conn Station whenever Ensign Sage would go and deal with Engineering, or leave as a part of an away mission and would contribute her expertise whenever it was requested. She always did have an eye for starships, after all.

Still reeling from the rescue of Lind Xadas, Kara had about a week to breathe before she was hit with yet another surprise. The little side mission to Kanjis-2 was a bit of a trial by fire compared to her previous experiences. Usually, she was at a Mission Ops Station, making sure the Sally Ride was staying on course and feeding information about incoming vessels to silently support the senior staff.

Her new situation didn’t leave her much personal time but everyone seemed understanding about the fact that her plate got full so quickly. She would say hello and have meals with friends but she was still running around keeping herself busy as if to prove she was more than capable of keeping up with her duties. Through it all, she somehow managed to keep herself afloat. Having just gotten used to her new routine, there was yet another surprise when she decided to show up for her monthly counselling session a few days later.

When she entered the Counselling Office, there was a new face at the desk, one she didn’t recognise.

“Ensign Hart, I’ve been expecting you.”

Kara tentatively sat down on the couch as the new Counselor stood from his desk to join her.

“I’m Counselor Tristan Peylore and I’ll be the one taking over your file. I’ve been tasked to check in on some of the more stable cases to ease into my role here.”

His comment was met with a ‘You must be new here’ expression from Kara. “You were on Kanjis-2, weren’t you?” she asked with her arms crossed as he finally sat down next to her.

“Yes, yes I was,” Counselor Peylore replied, “Your Captain was kind enough to offer me this position as the ship’s counselor so I took it.”

Kara said nothing more as she glanced out the window to look at the stars, her gaze staring off into the distance.

“It says here that you’ve skipped past sessions, particularly in times of high stress.”

“I haven’t skipped any in the last two months,” Kara immediately countered but did not move to make eye contact.

“It’s perfectly normal to need to talk to someone for mental health reasons,” he went on, “That’s why I’m here.”

“I know,” Kara replied flatly.

“And it’s not healthy to bottle things up.”

When it became clear to her that the new guy was made aware of her tendency to only go to sessions when she felt like she needed it rather than stick to a schedule, Kara finally turned to face him as he continued speaking.

“It’s far too easy to get into your own head and bury your stress and anxiety but that’s not healthy. Let’s just talk. It’ll help you feel better.”

There was a part of Kara that wanted to give her new Counselor such a hard time, but there was something about him and the gentle way he spoke compelling her to share. He was feeling less like a Counselor and more like a friend. “What did you want to talk about?” she asked, the edge slowly fading from her tone as she spoke.

“How have you been doing since your last session?”

Kara was about to lie and tell Counselor Peylore that she was fine but she paused for a moment to consider sharing with him. Again, it was his tone that compelled her to share, the way his tone conveyed his caring nature and his genuine desire to help. “The anniversary of my parents’ death a while back was hard but I think I’ve finally bounced back,” she told him quietly, “I’ve been doing a lot a better than I’ve been in recent months, not that the anxiety and the stress ever go away.”

Counselor Peylore nodded. “Stress and anxiety never really do. You just learn to manage it the best you can.”

Kara watched as he wrote something down and added, “I mean, it’s one thing to know you can do your job during Gamma shift where nothing really happens but it’s a whole other thing to have the senior staff around, it’s a bit of pressure not to screw up your job.”

Looking up from his notes, Counselor Peylore asked, “Where do you think that pressure comes from?”

“I just don’t want to screw up in front of my superiors,” Kara explained pointedly, “You would feel exactly the same way if you were in my position.”

“I’m sure you’ve risen to the occasion though, Ensign.”

“I try my best.”

“So your file says you’re a flight controller. You like to fly?”

“Yeah, it’s what I live for. Astronavigation, Starship Recognition, I’m all about it. Actually, Ensign Sage and I were in the same graduating class. I definitely was the starship nerd of our class. I couldn’t get into the guts of a starship like Lark could, I mean, I could, but I wasn't as good as her, I'm still not as good as her, but I knew the technical manuals inside out. I can identify non-Federation vessels better than most.”

“I had the chance to get to know Ensign Sage; she helped me over at the Environmental Control Center where we were doing our terraforming work. She was just fearless, putting her hands into all sorts of panels.”

“Yeah, that’s definitely a Lark Sage thing.”

“She’s a lovely gal. Do you have anyone else you consider a friend on this ship?”

“I mean there’s Ensign HaLevi, who was also in my graduating class. He and I have been friends for years now. Ensign Chorka is one of my favourite people in the world. More recently, Lieutenant Bauer and I have been getting to know each other. I mean I’m friendly with quite a few people but I also like to keep to myself to recharge the batteries. I get overwhelmed if I don’t take things in manageable chunks.”

“Do you feel overwhelmed a lot, Kara?”

Kara felt herself relax even more; while the Counselor’s tone had not changed, his use of her first name made the conversation even more intimate and familiar and slowly put her more at ease without even trying.

“I try not to.” That was as honest as she was going to be, at least that was the plan.

“Things happen despite our best efforts, and some things fall beyond our control.”

“Control is not a problem with me. When I fly, I am the one in control. That’s all there is to it.” Kara narrowed her eyes, her walls going up despite Peylore’s best efforts. “If you’ve been reading my file, what is the point of this asinine exercise of getting me to talk about things you can clearly learn about just by reading a few pages?”

Counselor Peylore set his notes on the couch between the two of them. “This is about earning your trust and getting you comfortable enough to confide in me. I’m just trying to find those spaces I can poke around in with you. Your file only gives me what you’ve given your previous Counselors, and judging by the amount of sessions you’ve skipped in the past, I don’t think it paints the whole picture for me. Besides, the old adage goes, ‘You cannot help those who do not want to be helped’. I can’t force you to talk about anything but I can provide the safe space for you to talk about whatever you wish to talk about.”

“Let me make one thing clear: Whatever control issues you think you picked up, they don’t exist,” Kara explained with a pointed tone, her expression turning defensive.

“Sounds like something someone with control issues would say,” Counselor Peylore replied with a playful grin before he seriously asked, “Are you ready to talk about them now?”

“No,” Kara replied flatly, “No amount of talking about my control issues is going to bring my parents back.”

The initial attempt the counselor made to keep a neutral expression failed him as Kara tilted her head in response to his sad smile, which caused him to quickly revert back to his neutral expression. “I understand,” he told her, “I just want you to know you’re not alone, that you can come to me about anything.”

Kara’s expression softened slightly. “I know. I just, I have this need to just be able to handle things on my own, you know?”

“I’m here to keep you mentally healthy,” Peylore reminded his newest patient, “I take that very seriously.”

“I know, I appreciate it...I’ll keep it in mind.”

Counselor Peylore nodded and sighed. “You know the deal, you’ve got one mandatory session a month, but you’re free to drop in and chat. Just check in first, see if I’m in a session.”

“Understood, Counselor.”

“See you next month, Ensign.”

Kara wordlessly stood up and left the office, leaving Tristan to review his notes on the couch.


End file.
